Yesterday, scientistical humanoids utilized supra-hella-cool machines for the purposes of snack reconnaissance. The GH1603 Rotational Dynamic Sucrose-SodiumChloride Detection Probe sent back information to Earth that shocked scientistical humanoids. They then went to lunch to celebrate the great discovery. Upon passing the Asteroid Belt on its way to Jupiter to attempt a gravitational acceleration to explore the far reaches of the solar system for the "Snack to end all snacks," GH1603 reported back data indicating the existence of a half-eaten oatmeal raisin cookie. This comes as a monumental discovery. Whereas it is well known that several thousand oatmeal raisin cookies inhabit the Asteroid Belt, none have ever been reported to have a bite taken out of it. This raises questions about the missing link to a unified field theory.Theorists are already working on fitting in an adjusted gravitational constant accounting for an increased attraction between all matter and oatmeal raisin cookies. Apparently, Forcal Pladinsti of 75 Wood Thrush Way walked into a focused gravitational cookie ray and was instantly sucked into outer space towards the cookie. He traveled so fast that he was able to reach the Asteroid Belt and take a bite of the cookie before dying in the harsh conditions of outer space. This monumental discovery is expected to have massive consequences in the future of humanoid technology. It is rumored that a superior cookie based computing system, as well as a PDA/Cookie are currently in development. For more information, please visit the Crawford Institute for the Turminally Nom.
Tally Ho
No comments:
Post a Comment